Jeff: (Narrating)
36 days ago, 16 Americans began the adventure of a lifetime. Abandoned
on Newfoundland's rugged northeastern coast, hundreds of miles from the
nearest civilization, they quickly formed first impressions. Their
goal, to work together to build a new society while competing against one
another for the title of sole Survivor and $1 million. Without fire,
water, or food, they utilized the resources of the land and their own survival
skills. Some quickly became the best of friends, others were quick
to battle. And everybody had to deal with the realities of a harsh
sub-polar landscape. .
They were divided
into two tribes, Coble and Platz, and competed against one another in challenges.
And although Coble lost the first Immunity Challenge due to a fluke, it
soon became apparent that Coble was the dominant tribe. Platz
went to two Tribal Councils in a row, where Kris was able to use the religious
differences within the tribe to gain himself a numerical advantage.
With John's departure at the third tribal council, Kris and his alliance
mates, Libby, Maria, and Clint, thought that they could coast to the Final
Four. But a reshuffling of the tribes sent the Survivors scrambling
for new strategies. .
On the surface,
the two new tribes couldn't be more different. New Coble stood as
a shining beacon of team unity, while conflict was the name of the game
at new Platz. This was reflected in the challenges, and new Platz
would go to Tribal Council twice more before the merge. Despite being
outnumbered by the hostile forces of Brian and Maria, Lora showed remarkable
spirit and resilience by outlasting Clint and Mary Ellen and making it
to the merge. .
On this new tribe,
Smallwood, the battle lines were quickly drawn. Will's new Coble
alliance, plus Lora and minus Kris, was quick to prove its superiority,
and one by one the members of new Platz began to fall. But by Day
27, Will had became bored with this arrangement and decided to stir things
up. He threw Kris a lifeline, and along with Sylvia and Kevin, they
voted out the well-liked Melissa. With this one game-altering move,
stability became a thing of the past. Alliances seemed to change
at whim as Lora and Amanda struggled to survive against seemingly insurmountable
odds. And survive they did. Dan and Kevin became victims of
the unpredictable alliances, and only five survivors remained. .
Last week, the
question of whether Sylvia's loyalty lie with Will or Kris was answered.
Kris and Lora found themselves on the outside as Amanda was seemingly aligned
with the Will/Sylvia pair. But before Tribal Council, Kris was able
to convince Amanda that Will and Sylvia's joint voting strategy made them
far too powerful. She refused to vote out Will, since she hoped to
bring him to the Final Two with her, but she wasn't opposed to getting
rid of Sylvia, with whom she'd had a longtime rivalry. After a bit
of prodding, Lora agreed to vote out her new friend Sylvia and the pair
was separated at Tribal Council. .
Only four remain:
Lora, Will, Kris, and Amanda. Tonight, they will compete against
each other in their final immunity challenges. Two will continue
on to face the jury. One will outlast all the rest and become the
sole Survivor.
Theme
Song
Smallwood
.
(The Final
Four return from the previous Tribal Council.
Will leads
the procession, looking slightly disappointed)
.
Will: (to himself) And
now I'm truly alone...
.
(The tribe
arrives back at camp)
.
Will: Night.
.
(Will walks
away from the others into the night. Lora rolls her eyes to Kris
and Amanda)
.
Lora: Going off
to pout like a little boy. I'm going to bed.
.
(Lora heads
to the shelter, leaving Kris and Amanda alone)
.
Kris: You did
the right thing, Amanda.
.
Amanda: I'm
not so sure...
.
Amanda: (Narrating)
Before Tribal Council, Kris convinced me to get rid of Sylvia instead of
staying in the voting bloc with her and Will. I'm still not sure
if it was a wise move on my part or not. I guess we'll just have
to wait and see on that one. I really didn't mind getting rid of
her, since we hadn't ever really gotten along. At any rate, making
it to the final two with Will now is going to require two immunity wins
and a lot of luck. I just hope I have it in me. .
Kris: (Narrating)
Going into Tribal Council, I was certain that I would be the one to go.
I think it was a piece of master manipulating on my part to get Lora and
Amanda to both come with me. If either of them had floundered and
not voted for Sylvia, my game would have been over. I do owe
them both equally for allowing me to make it into this final round. (grins)
But that doesn't mean I'm going to return the favor. .
Kris: I have
a feeling that tomorrow is going to be big.
.
Amanda: Yeah,
I guess.
.
Kris: It's
easy for one to make miscalculations in the endgame. I can only hope
that I'll be able to keep my mind on track.
.
Amanda: Yeah,
that makes two of us.
.
(There's
a pause)
.
Kris: What
is this plan of yours, exactly, Amanda?
.
Amanda: (tenses
up) I can't tell you that.
.
Kris: Of course.
I understand. Just as I wouldn't tell you mine. I truly admire
your analytical mind, Amanda.
.
Amanda: Um,
thanks... Hadn't we better get to bed, too?
.
Kris: After
you.
.
Amanda: (Narrating)
Kris has always creeped me out somewhat. He's a fairly nice guy,
but there's just something about him that chills my blood. I've watched
his entire game play out. Time and time again, he's taken adversity
and turned it around to his advantage. He's good, I'll admit it.
But that doesn't mean I'll ever trust him. .
(Kris and
Amanda settle into the shelter next to Lora. Will never comes to
bed.
The night
passes, and a new day rises on Camp Smallwood. Will and Amanda go
about their
usual exercise routines as usual while Kris and Lora sleep in)
.
Will: (Narrating)
I'm actually somewhat surprised to still be here this morning. As
soon as Sylvia saved me at the previous Tribal Council, I knew that one
of us would be next. The others would be idiots not to try to break
up a pair when they had the chance. We'd expected them to to target
me, but I suppose that I can understand Amanda's reasoning. Sylvia
would have pushed for her to go, so it probably was in her best interest
to get rid of her rival. I am sorry
to see Sylvia go, but I think that she was always in a bit over her head
as we played this game. She saw it more as an experiment than a contest
for a million dollars. Still, she was right about one thing:
I do need to reconcile with Lora. It's a broken relationship,
and I don't think I can really be at peace until I get that repaired. .
(As Will
cools down from his workout, Lora exits the shelter)
(Will shakes
his head and grabs a pile of firewood. He
builds up
the fire as Lora, Kris, and Amanda gather around it)
.
Will: So, the
final four, huh? Who would have thought that this would be
the group to make it to the end?
.
Kris: (chuckles)
How true.
.
Will: Look
at us. Two guys. Two girls. Two Cobles. Two Platzes.
And if I do say so, the four best players in the game.
.
(Lora rolls
her eyes as Kris studies his opponents)
.
Kris: (Narrating)
As Will said, the Final Four is indeed two Cobles and two Platzes.
And Amanda is not the Platz that I would want here. She's
far too smart for her own good, a fact which I recognized almost immediately.
I was all primed to get rid of her before that d***ed swap, but that
fell through. If anyone can take this game from me now, I feel that
she's the one who can do it. .
Lora: (Narrating)
It's gotten to the point where I can't even listen to Will talk.
How can I after what he did to me?
.
(Will continues
talking to the group)
.
Will: Who'd have
thought we'd be the last two Cobles standing, Lora?
.
Lora: (bitterly)
Oh yeah right, Will. If you'd had your way, I'd have been gone a
long time ago.
.
Will: That's
not true, Lora.
.
Lora: Oh,
whatever. You are such a liar.
.
Will: How
am I a liar?
.
Lora: (mockingly)
"Oh sure, Lora. I'll always be there to protect you."
.
Will: Lora,
I meant that.
.
Lora: (getting up)
Whatever! I'm not even going to listen to this!
.
(Lora gets
up and walks away)
.
Will: (calling after
her) Lora!
.
(Will turns
to Kris and Amanda)
.
Will: What
more can I do?
.
Amanda: I
don't know. It's going to take something drastic.
.
Will: Yeah...
.
(Suddenly,
Will bolts off after Lora. Amanda and Kris look at one
another and
shrug. Will begins to catch up to the fleeing Lora)
.
Will: Lora!
Get back here!
.
Lora: (Calling back)
Leave me alone, Will!
.
Will: Not
until you talk to me!
.
(Will catches
up with Lora and grabs her by the arm)
.
Lora: (struggling)
Let go of me, Will!
.
Will: I'm
not trying to hurt you! (yelling into her face) Just stop and listen to
me!
.
(Lora stops
struggling and looks at Will)
.
Will: (angrily)
Why do you refuse to forgive me? Huh?
.
Lora: I don't
know...
.
Will: Give
me a good reason!
.
Lora: You
said you'd protect me...
.
Will: And
when have I not? Who was there for you when Smiley was all set to
rape you?
.
Lora: You
were... But...
.
Will: But
what?
.
Lora: You
voted against me.
.
Will: No I
didn't. I voted against Mrs. Brennit and Dan. Not once did
I cast a vote your way.
.
Lora: But
you would have.
.
Will: How
do you know that?
.
Lora: I don't
know...
.
Will: Look,
I've betrayed almost everyone in this game. It's just the way I'm
playing. Kris and Amanda aren't holding grudges, and I've betrayed
both of them.
.
Lora: But
that's different...
.
Will: No it
isn't. I know we have a history, but that's in the past now.
We're here playing this game now, and that has nothing to do with how I
feel about you in real life. (pauses) Well, actually...
.
Lora: What?
.
Will: The
way I feel about you in real life does have an impact on this game, because
I'd much rather see you win than Amanda or Kris.
.
Lora: Really?
.
Will: Yes!
.
(Lora appears
to soften for a moment, then regains her determination)
.
Lora: I can't
believe that.
.
(Lora turns
to walk away)
.
Will: (yelling)
Dangit, Lora! What do you want me to do?
.
Lora: All
I know is that actions speak louder than any words, and your actions have
told me that you don't want me. If you want to prove me wrong, go
for it. But I'm not holding my breath.
.
(Lora walks
away, leaving Will frustrated and saddened)
.
Will: (Narrating)
I've tried talking rationally to Lora, and that hasn't worked. And
today, in my desire to patch up this broken relationship, I ran Lora down
and basically screamed at her. That didn't work either. I don't
know what it's going to take, but before this game is over, I have to patch
things up with her.
.
Lora: (Narrating)
I think that maybe, just maybe, Will's sincere about this. (begins crying)
It just feels so bad to be rejected. And he's done it to me twice.
He says that this time it was just part of the game, and, who knows, maybe
he's telling the truth. It's just so hard to trust someone after
they've betrayed you. And I'm not sure I can do that with Will.
I just don't know...
.
(Amanda and
Kris go for Tree Mail)
.
Amanda: Our final
tree mail.
.
Kris: How
I'll miss these cleverly worded poems.
.
Amanda: Oh,
they're literary masterpieces. Let's see how bad this one is: (reading)
So you four have made it
Here to the end.
Just what were the names
Of those "others," again?
.
Did you pay attention
To those no longer around?
If you fail at this pop quiz
You could be jury-bound.
.
(Amanda and
Kris return and show the Tree Mail to Will. Lora's nowhere in sight)
.
Will: Fallen Comrades.
A man never wins this.
.
Kris: Perhaps
I can change that.
.
Will: I doubt
it. Lora and Amanda are sharp.
.
(Amanda smiles
slightly to herself. She walks away from Will and Kris and digs out
her
journal.
She flips through it to show that it has page after page of notes on the
other players)
.
Amanda: (Narrating)
No offense to Lora, but there's no way that I'm losing Fallen Comrades.
I love to eavesdrop on people, since no one ever suspects that I'm listening
to them. I've been taking notes on what people have been saying since
the beginning of the game. I'm not worried about leaving tonight.
It's tomorrow that concerns me. .
(As the sun
begins to set, Lora re-enters camp, her eyes red and puffy. The
Survivors
gather up their torches and begin to hike towards Tribal Council)
.
Kris: (Narrating)
The endgame is what I live for. I only despair that I make it here
without a proper alliance. There's no bunny to drop at the four spot,
no bear to hand me a spot in the final two, and no goat to drag to the
final two. Well, not officially, anyway. I suppose that I shall
just have to make do with what I've been given. .
(The Survivors
draw near the the glaring fires of Tribal Council)
Tribal
Council # 13 / Immunity Challenge: Fallen Comrades
(The Survivors
enter Tribal Council)
.
Jeff: Go ahead and
have a seat, put your pads on your lap. We'll bring in the members
of our jury.
.
(Brian, Melissa,
Dan, Kevin, and Sylvia enter)
.
Jeff: Tonight's
Immunity Challenge will take place here at tribal council. It will
be followed immediately with a vote, in which the thirteenth member of
the tribe will be voted out. Tonight's Immunity Challenge will test
how well you've gotten to know your fellow survivors. I'm going to
ask you a series of questions. They'll be based either on individuals
you've all lived with who are no longer in the game or events that transpired
in the last 37 days. First person to get to ten points wins immunity.
Clear?
.
Amanda: Yes.
.
Will: Let's
do it!
.
Jeff: (to Amanda)
I'll take back the immunity necklace.
.
(Amanda gets
up and hands Jeff the necklace)
.
Jeff: Thank
you. The all important immunity back up for grabs. OK, first
question:.
What are the
names of Melissa's three children? .
(Melissa
beams with pride. The Survivors write their answers on their tablets)
.
Melissa's kids.
OK, reveal.
.
Amanda - Austin,
Reid, and Emmy
Kris - AUSTIN
REID EMMY
Lora - Austin
Reed + Emmy
Will - Austin
Reid Emmy
.
Jeff: She
must've talked about them a lot.
.
Melissa: Guilty
as charged.
.
Jeff: All
correct. You each get a point. OK, next question is visual.
.
(Jeff pulls
out a lime green tank top)
.
Jeff: Whose
shirt is this? .
(Jeff passes
the shirt around to the Survivors, who look at it and write down their
answers)
.
Jeff: OK.
Everybody done? Reveal.
.
Amanda - Libby
Kris - MARIA
Lora - Libby
Will - Libby
.
Jeff: Correct
answer was Libby. Everyone but Kris gets it right. Amanda,
Lora, Will at two points, Kris at one. Next question:
.
What is the name
of Dan's wife? .
(Dan smiles
as the Survivors write down their answers)
.
Jeff: If I
could have everyone reveal.
.
Amanda - Susan
Kris - SARAH
Lora - Susan
Will - Susan
.
Jeff: And
Susan is, of course, correct. Wrong again, Kris. Amanda, Lora,
and Will are up to three. Kris still has one. Next question:
.
What's the name
of Maria's twin sister, and for a bonus point, which one is older? .
(The Survivors
write their answers)
.
Jeff: Need
an answer. Reveal.
.
Amanda - Marcia,
Marcia is older
Kris - MARCIA,
MARIA
Lora - Marseah,
Maria older
Will - Marcia,
Marcia is older
.
Jeff: You're
all right. Maria's twin sister is Marcia. And Marcia is two
minutes older, so only Will and Amanda got that.
.
Lora: Crap!
.
Jeff: Amanda
and Will at five, Lora at four, Kris at two. Next question's about
the game: .
How many challenges
have the Coble tribe or individual members of original Coble won? .
(The Survivors
sit there and think back to all the challenges, then write their answers)
.
Jeff: Sum
total of the Coble tribe's wins and any individual challenge wins.
Reveal.
.
Amanda - 16
Kris - 13
Lora - 20
Will - 14
.
Jeff: Correct
answer was 15. Nobody gets it right. Amanda and Will still
tied at five. Next question is another visual.
.
(Jeff pulls
out a dirty bra)
.
Jeff: Whose
bra is this?
.
(The Survivors
pass the bra around. Will pulls it back like
a slingshot
when he gets it, which causes Sylvia to stifle a laugh)
.
Jeff: Reveal.
.
Amanda - Mary
Ellen's
Kris - SUE
ELLEN
Lora - Mrs.
Brennit
Will - Mary
Ellen
.
Jeff: Who
is Sue Ellen, Kris?
.
Kris: Is that
not the obnoxious black-haired woman?
.
Jeff: That's
Mary Ellen. Amanda and Will are correct. They're tied
at six. Lora's at four. Kris still at two. Next question:
.
We have a lot
of students in our cast. Which one is majoring in agrology? .
(The Survivors
write their answers)
.
Jeff: Who's
majoring in Ag? Reveal.
.
Amanda - Clint
Kris - CLINT
Lora - Clint
Will - Clint
.
Jeff: And
it was Clint. You all get a point. Amanda and Will have
seven points, Lora has five, Kris has three. Next question, another
game-related: .
How many people
stayed in their original tribes at the swap? .
(The Survivors
count to themselves, then write down their answers)
.
Jeff: Non-swapees.
Reveal.
.
Amanda - 5
Kris - 5
Lora - 6
Will - 5
.
Jeff: Will,
Sylvia, Dan, Clint, and Maria. That's five. Everyone got it
right but Lora. Amanda and Will now have eight points, Lora has five,
and Kris has four. Next question: .
What is Brian's
current occupation? .
(Brian glowers
at the Survivors as they write their answers)
.
Jeff: What
does Smiley do? Reveal.
.
Amanda - Construction
worker
Kris - BOUNCER
Lora - Construction
Will - Construction
Worker
.
Jeff: Construction
work is right. Amanda and Will, up to nine points, Lora at six, Kris
at four. All right, last question. Will, Amanda, if either
of you gets this wrong, the other wins. If you both get it right,
we'll have a tie..
What was Kevin's
Luxury Item? .
(Kevin grins
at the mention of his name. The Survivors write their answers)
.
Amanda - Meteorite
Kris - METEORITE
Lora - Meteorite
Will - Meteorite
.
Jeff: Meteorite
is correct. You still got that thing, Kev?
.
(Kevin pulls
out his meteorite)
.
Kevin: Yup.
(holding up a small rock) Right here.
.
Jeff: Very
good. OK, here's where we stand: Will and Amanda are tied at
ten points, so we'll go to a tie-breaker round. Only Will and Amanda
will answer. Kris and Lora, you're done. I'm going to ask a
series of questions. First one to miss loses, the other person wins
Immunity. Sound fair?
.
Will and Amanda:
Yeah.
.
Jeff: All
right. Your first tie-breaker question: .
How many votes
did Clint receive at the fifth Tribal Council? .
(Will and
Amanda exchange a questioning glance)
.
Jeff: Neither
one of you was there, so you're just gonna have to reason this one out.
.
(Will and
Amanda write down their answers)
.
Jeff: Maybe
someone told you what happened. All right, reveal.
.
Amanda - 4
Will - Four
.
Jeff: You
both say four, and you're both correct. That was our first tie, but
Mary Ellen ended up changing her vote. All right, next question:
.
How many piercings
does Sylvia have? .
(Sylvia grins
as Will and Amanda write down their answers)
.
Jeff: If one
of you misses and the other gets it right, you're done. Reveal.
.
Amanda - 2
Will - Two
.
Jeff: Two
is right. Just the ears. All right. Next question:
.
With which cartoon
character is Dan obsessed? .
(Amanda mouths
"cartoon character?" Will confidently writes down the answer)
.
Jeff: OK,
reveal.
.
Amanda:
Mickey Mouse
Will:
Scooby Doo
.
Jeff: Amanda,
Mickey Mouse is incorrect. Will, Scooby Doo is correct.
Will wins immunity.
.
Will: Wooo!!!
.
Amanda: (quietly)
No!
.
(Dan smirks
as Jeff gets up and places the immunity necklace around Will's neck)
.
Jeff: OK,
you can put your pads down if you want. Well, this is obviously a
very big vote. Will, as it sits now, you have that immunity necklace,
you cannot be voted for. You guys look surprised.
.
Amanda: I
really thought that I could take that.
.
Kris: I don't
believe that anyone planned for Will to win immunity tonight. This
is going to screw with everyone's plans.
.
Jeff: Well,
does anyone need to discuss voting, then? As always, this is an open
forum.
.
(Kris and
Amanda both begin to speak)
.
Kris: Go ahead.
.
Amanda: Thanks.
(turns to Will) We have to vote for Lora right now and try to force
a tie.
.
Lora: (cutting in)
Excuse me? We have to get rid of me?
.
Amanda: (ignoring
Lora) Look at her, Will. She's going to be good at the next
immunity challenge. She's got the body type to stand for hours.
And if she wins that, it means that one of us has to face her in the Final
Two. We can't win against her. She's too well-liked.
.
Jeff: Will,
reaction?
.
Will: What
you're saying makes sense, Amanda. But in the end, I'm going to have
to vote the way I want to.
.
Amanda: Just
consider who you can win against.
.
Will: I am.
.
Jeff: Anyone
else? Kris, Lora, you got your strategies in order?
.
Lora: Yeah.
.
Kris: I believe
so.
.
Jeff: OK,
then. It is now time to vote. Amanda, you're first.
.
(Amanda goes
up to vote. She votes for Lora)
.
Amanda: Lora,
like I said, if we let you go any further you're going to win Hands
on the Immunity Idol and then beat any of us in the Final Two.
You have to go.
.
(Kris is
up next, followed by Lora. She votes for Amanda)
.
Lora: You're
not going to get rid of me this easily, Amanda. I've come too far
to go out like this.
.
(Finally,
Will votes. We don't see it. He puts his vote in the canister
and returns)
.
Jeff: I'll
go tally the votes.
.
(Jeff leaves
and returns with the canister)
.
Jeff:
Once the votes have been read, the decision is final. The person
will be asked to leave the Tribal Council area immediately. I'll
read the votes. First vote:
.
.
.
Amanda
.
Lora
.
Jeff: One
vote Amanda, one vote Lora.
.
.
Amanda
.
.
Last vote:
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Amanda
.
Amanda: (sighs)
No...
.
Jeff: Amanda,
I need you to bring me your torch.
.
(Amanda silently
grabs her torch and approaches Jeff)
.
Jeff: Amanda,
the tribe has spoken. (snuffs her torch) It's time for you to go.
.
(Amanda nods
and walks out of Tribal Council)
.
Jeff: Well,
one way or another, the three of you have made it to the Final Three.
You have a long journey ahead of you tomorrow. You can head back
to camp.
.
(Will, Lora,
and Kris exit)
Amanda's Final Words:
Will! I thought you were smarter than that! I don't know what
your plan is now, but I'll be very surprised if it works. (pauses) Ugh!
I can't believe I lost Fallen Comrades! That challenge was
made for me! (muttering) Stupid Dan... (sighs) Oh well.
I knew coming into this that I had to be lucky with immunities. That
was a risk included in my plan, and it just didn't work out. It was
probably impossible for all the factors to line up exactly how they were
supposed to. I made it as far as I could on my own, and I never stopped
fighting. I think that I played the best game I could have, and my
only regret is that I didn't get to at least compete in the final challenge.
Now all that's left to do is finish up with jury duty. (pauses) What kind
of a grown man likes Scooby Doo?
Voting Record
Amanda:
Lora
Kris:
Amanda
Lora:
Amanda
Will:
Amanda
Smallwood
.
(It's still
night. The Final Three return from Tribal Council.
Will's grinning
as he walks back into the campsite)
.
Will: (Narrating)
It felt good to perform one last shake-up. Going into that Tribal
Council, I was completely powerless, but through that fluke immunity win,
I suddenly became the swing. Amanda had become a little too powerful,
and without immunity, I would have been her good little monkey boy for
the rest of the game. I may be a lot of things, but I'm not a passive
drone to be dragged to the final two. .
(Lora watches
Will as he prepares for bed. She sighs slightly to herself)
.
Lora: (Narrating)
I was surprised that Will voted out Amanda. I really thought that
they had some kind of thing going, but now I'm really thinking that Will
was serious. If he'd wanted to get rid of me, he had his chance.
But no... He kept me around. I really think that I've been
wrong about him.
.
(Lora and
Will enter the shelter and fall asleep almost instantly. Kris lingers
outside for a moment)
.
Kris: (Narrating)
The game's winding down now. My only task for tomorrow is to select
which of my remaining tribemates I'd rather sit beside in the Final Two.
It's a decision that could make or break my game, and I'm not going to
take it lightly. .
(Kris finally
goes to bed as well. The night passes quickly. Around 4 a.m.,
Jeff approaches Camp Smallwood with a torch. He holds it into the
shelter and lights it up. The three Survivors begin to stir)
.
Jeff: Hey
guys! Wake up!
.
Will: The
heck? Anal?
.
Jeff: Good
morning. It's day 38, and you have a very long day ahead of you.
.
Lora: (groggily)
What time is it?
.
Jeff: It's
early. Very early. All right guys, day 38, time to prepare
for your last immunity challenge. Grab your stuff and come with me.
.
Kris: All
right, all right.
.
(The three
reluctantly rise and follow Jeff. As the sun begins to rise, Jeff
leads
them through
the meadow and into the forest. They stop in a clearing. A
stream
can be seen
running by, its waters sparkling in the early morning's light)
.
Jeff: All
right, this morning's festivites will begin by this stream. The Vikings
held a belief that running water was inherently good and could ward off
evil spirits. And that's what you're doing here today. You're
shedding any evils you've had to perform to make it this far in the game.
.
Will: Do you
even realize how campy that sounds?
.
Jeff: (Ignoring
Will) The Vikings believed that by describing something, putting it into
words, you gained control over it. That's why they told their sagas,
long, heroic tales of their escapades in foreign lands. Today, you're
going to tell your saga. Using the Viking's runes, you're going to
describe your game.
.
(Jeff pulls
a piece of burlap from a stone covered in markings)
.
Jeff: Here
are the runes, for reference. You'll write it on this parchment.
.
(Jeff pulls
out three scrolls)
.
Jeff: That's
real sheepskin.
.
Will: Not
your first experience with that, is it, Probsty?
.
(Lora actually
giggles a bit at Will's joke. Jeff ignores them)
.
Jeff: Once
you've told your saga and mastered your sins in this game, you'll begin
your journey to the sea. On the way, you'll pay tribute to your former
tribemates as you walk past their torches. When you reach the ocean,
you'll place your parchment in a boat, then send it off into the waves.
There, the sea will claim your tale, and you'll be cleansed of all wrongdoing.
.
Will: "Cleansed
of all wrongdoing." Roight...
.
Jeff: (ignoring
Will) I'm sure you guys are eager to write your sagas, so I'll leave you
to that.
.
(Jeff exits.
Will looks at the rune stone, then turns to Kris)
.
Will: So we're
supposed to transliterate the story of our game from English into runes?
.
Kris: (annoyed)
Yes, Will. Had you been listening, you'd know that.
.
Will: What?
You're actually taking this crap seriously?
.
Kris: I think
that perhaps we could all benefit from this exercise.
.
Will: All
right...
.
(The Survivors
begin writing on the parchment in runes. Will
chuckles
to himself as he writes, but Kris and Lora take it seriously)
.
Lora: (Narrating)
I'm writing the story of a girl who was forced to learn this game as she
went along. When she came out here, she didn't know anything about
how to vote or form alliances. She just did whatever her boyfriend
told her. But then the game changed, her "boyfriend" revealed his
true colors, and she had to start fighting for her life. She learned
to fend for herself, and in the process, she forgot how to trust.
It would take a truly selfless act for her to regain her heart. .
Kris: (Narrating)
My tale is that of a clever fox who had his game planned long before he
arrived on these shores. He knew what sort of animals he was looking
for: a bear, a goat, and a bunny, and he found them readily available within
his own clan. But when the fates threw him a curveball, he found
himself without forces. The fox was wily, however, and he made due.
With his silver toungue as his only weapon, he eluded the vote time after
time. As the end drew near, he knew that only an act of valor would
allow him to reach the top. .
Will: (Narrating)
Yeah, I was going to write about my game, but... I didn't want to.
So my saga's about a Mexican peasant named Leezabeth who comes to America
in search of chickweed. Much to her dismay, the chickweed was sentient,
and now she's fighting a war with the "fowl" stuff. .
(The Survivors
near the end of their sagas)
.
Will: You guys
are really getting into that, huh?
.
Kris: When
one signs up for this game, one realizes there will be a bit of schmaltz
factor. But there are also lessons to be learned. Perhaps if
you'd embrace this, you could learn a bit about yourself, Will.
.
(Will furrows
his brow and seems to consider this)
.
Will: Nah...
.
Lora: Well,
I just finished the last part of my saga. The part where my prince
falls back to his promise.
.
Will: "Prince?"
.
Lora: Yeah.
I believe you, Will.
.
Will: w00t!
.
(Lora smiles)
.
Kris: If you
two are finished, we should begin our journey.
.
Will: You
mean the cheesy torch walk?
.
Kris: Yes.
.
(The Survivors
roll up their scrolls and exit the clearing. As they walk up a hill
and out of the forest, they pass a torch, stuck into the ground.
The wooden tag is labeled "Becky." As they look at it, footage of
Becky plays and she speaks her thoughts on the game)
.
Becky: (Narrating)
I don't really think that I was an ideal candidate for Survivor.
For me, it was more about getting the camp organized than it was about
getting people to like me or coming up with voting strategies. I
guess that became apparent at the first Tribal Council.
..
(Shots of
Becky shouting instructions as Coble unpacks its goods, leading
the tribe
in a meeting, throwing her hands up to the sky in frustration
.
Will looks
at her torch with a bit of regret. The Survivors move on and come
across Bob's torch)
.
Bob: (Narrating)
The game of Survivor is inherently deceitful. I would have
never lied to get myself further in the game, even if the others did so
and flourished because of it. Does that make them better off than
me? Personally, I believe not. You see, I can live without
guilt after exiting the game, and I believe that I'm far richer for that.
.
(Shots of
Bob leading the group in a prayer, studying his Bible, working on the shelter.
.
Kris chuckles
to himself as he remembers his early Platz days. Not far down the
path is John's torch)
.
John: (Narrating)
I'm still surprised at my tribe's choice to get rid of me, but I realize
now that it was strategy. I guess that I should have started thinking
strategically earlier on. If I could do it all again, I would have
secured a majority before we ever went to our first vote. Oh well...
Live and learn.
.
(Shots of
John holding up Platz's crappy frying pan as he mocks it, making a horrible
face as he
gets his first taste of chickweed, grinning at the camera as he catches
his baseball.
.
Kris smirks
and pats John's torch. As the Survivors crest the hill, they pass
Libby's torch)
.
Libby: (Narrating)
The swap was really what did me in. I think that if I could have
stayed with Maria, I would have made it a lot farther. My new tribe
really sucked.
.
(Shots of
Libby getting gunned down by Matt Heracles in Survivor Missouri's
maze challenge,
washing her hair with Maria, yelling at Amanda.
.
Kris looks
wistfully at the torch. Will just shakes his head and mutters to
himself.
The
trail starts down the hill towards a grassy meadow. Clint's torch
waits at the meadow's entrance)
.
Clint: (Narrating)
I done made the wrong choices. Stickin' with Kris was not
the way to go. He was just in it for hisself. You gotta be
careful who you trust in a game like this, or else you get burnt.
.
(Shots of
Clint tossing the ball around with John, spinning around to face Kris,
yelling angrily at Kevin.
.
Kris gives
Clint's torch a little bow, while Lora looks at it spitefully. The
Survivors
move through the meadow and arrive at Mary Ellen's torch)
.
Mary Ellen: (Narrating)
I think the generation gap was my downfall. Everyone else was just
so much younger than me. Not that I'm not young at heart! (braying
laugh) I think that I just worked too hard for those kids' tastes.
I mean, I'm easy to get along with, right? Right? Really, it
was all the kids' fault! (braying laugh)
.
(Shots of
Mary Ellen holding Kevin's meteorite, putting her arm around Lora's
shoulder,
and watching the moose. Her braying laughter echoes over the hills
.
The Survivors
move on through the meadow and arrive at Maria's torch)
.
Maria: (Narrating)
To be honest, I'm not proud of the game I played. I always try to
be nice to everyone, but I guess the stress of the situation got to be
too much for me. I'm really sorry to all the people I was a b****
to. I didn't make any friends like that, and I sure didn't win.
.
(Shots of
Maria sunbathing in a bikini, cheering Platz on in a challenge, rolling
on the ground fighting Lora.
.
Kris shakes
his head. Will laughs a bit as Lora kicks
Maria's torch.
The Survivors move on and pass Brian's torch)
.
Brian: (Narrating)
What a pansy a** game! Good god, it was pathetic to watch all the
little children scrambling around trying to get rid of me. I played
hard, I never held back, and anyone who can't deal with that can suck my
****.
.
(Shots of
Brian grinning broadly as he puts his arms around Maria and Lora, throwing
punches
at Clint,
Dan, and Will, letting out a yell to the sky after winning the endurance
challenge
.
All three
look at the torch in disgust. Will puts his arm around Lora's shoulders
as she
starts to
cry slightly. They move towards the end of the meadow and pass Melissa's
torch)
.
Melissa: (Narrating)
Wow! This game really took me by surprise! Never in a million
years would I have expected to go out the way that I did. (mock anger)
You voted me out! (laughs) No, I'm just kidding.
I think it's really cool that I was an important part the most exciting
change in this game.
.
(Shots of
Melissa carrying an armload of poisonous berries, clapping her hands excitedly,
boiling a
pot of chickweed, sitting with Lora and Sylvia and throwing her head back
in laughter.
.
The three
Survivors smile fondly as they remember Melissa. The Survivors
exit the
meadow and step onto a sandy beach. They pass Dan's torch)
.
Dan: (Narrating)
Well, I'm probably the only one, but I think that I played this game with
honor. The people who jumped alliances really need help. It's
not right to just abandon people who have been with you the whole game.
.
(Shots of
Dan talking on his cell phone, staring at Amanda, wolfing down sausage
in the pub.
.
Kris doesn't
even stop, but Will and Lora take a moment to pay
their respect
before moving down the beach past Kevin's torch)
.
Kevin: (Narrating)
Hey, buddy. They um, said to talk about the game. One time
while I was playing the game, I had a dream that I was a deer, and I could
run really fast on four legs. But then I woke up and I could only
run normal speed on my two legs. That was pretty disappointing.
Yeah...
.
(Shots of
Kevin diving in after the whale, star gazing with
Lora,holding
a bullfrog, staring in awe at the fireworks.
.
All three
Survivors smile at Kevin's memory. They continue down the beach past
Sylvia's torch)
.
Sylvia: (Narrating)
This game is involving. You have to keep track of everyone else's
neuroses and eccentricities while trying to keep your own in check.
I think I got too swept up in the game at times, and that really got me
into trouble. I should have stayed objective, but if I did that,
I wouldn't have had so much fun!
.
(Shots of
Sylvia reading her psychology book, doing the chicken dance in a
challenge,
analyzing Will and Kris, bickering with Amanda, piloting her boat.
.
All three
Survivors fondly remember their mutual friend. They move on and find
Amanda's torch)
.
Amanda: (Narrating)
I think that I was the only player in this game to have my whole plan mapped
out. I had a vision as to how it was going to go, but when one challenge
didn't go my way, it all came crashing down around me. I guess I
should have had back up options, but in the end, I really don't think there
was anything I could have done differently.
.
(Shots of
Amanda sitting under her tree eating an apple, turning
away in disgust
when Dan takes his shirt off, writing in her journal)
.
(The Survivors
continue past Amanda's torch and spot three small boats tethered to the
shore)
.
Kris: Shall we
send our sagas off?
.
Lora: Guess
so.
.
Will: I want
to keep mine!
.
(Lora laughs)
.
Lora: Come
on, give it up, Will!
.
Will: Yeah,
yeah...
.
(The Survivors
place their scrolls in their respective boats and send
them off
to sea. Once that's done, they continue down the beach)
Immunity
Challenge #2: Hands on the Immunity Idol
(The Survivors
arrive at a small rocky island, where Jeff is waiting. There are
six small vertical
logs positioned
around a thick wooden pillar. The immunity idol is fixed to the pillar's
top)
.
Jeff: Well, the
game is back on now. You are about to begin your final immunity challenge.
It's very simple. It is a test of endurance. You'll
each take a position around the idol. You'll step up onto two logs,
one foot on each log. You'll then take one hand, either one, place
it on the idol. Those are three points of contact. If at any time
any of those points of contact are broken, you're out. Feet have
to stay touching the log, hand has to stay touching the idol. Additionally,
if your other hand comes in and grabs onto the idol or the column to gain
your balance, you're also out. Last person standing wins immunity,
guaranteed to go to the final two, and as importantly, gets to decide
who sits next to them for the final vote. So, before we begin, I'll
take that one last time.
.
(Will takes
off the Immunity Necklace and hands it to Jeff)
.
Jeff: Guys,
for the last time, immunity back up for grabs. Take a position.
.
(Will, Lora,
and Kris, each step onto a log)
.
Jeff: All
right guys, the final and most important immunity challenge. Survivors
ready? (doing the arm thing) Begin.
.
(The Survivors
step up onto their logs and grab the idol.
As soon as
they settle in, Will begins to talk)
.
Will: Hands.
Yet another challenge skewed against men.
.
Lora: Boy,
you're a real masculist lately, aren't you?
.
Will: Just
stating a fact...
.
Jeff: The
challenge is completely fair. It all comes down to will. If
you want immunity badly enough, hang onto that thing!
.
Will: That's
what you said last night, too.
.
Jeff: I'd
try to stay a lot more focused if I were you.
.
Will: It's
just standing. How much focus can it take?
.
Jeff: You'd
be surprised.
.
(Pan around
the three Survivors. Will looks quite relaxed. Lora holds
on to the
idol with a death grip, her arm shaking as she looks around with
steely determination.
Kris is rock steady, his gaze never breaking from the idol)
.
Will: So, who's
up for singing the Friends theme?
.
Lora: Quiet,
Will!
.
Will: Guess
no one.
.
(Time passes.
Jeff comes around to pester the Survivors)
.
Jeff: Look at
that. The sun's starting to peek through those clouds. It may
get hot out here yet.
.
Lora: Go away,
Jeff!
.
(Jeff chuckles
to himself and walks off. More time passes, and Jeff returns)
.
Jeff: I'm
happy to inform you you've just reached an hour and a half. On a
day that started around 4:00 a.m.
.
Will: You
hear that, Kris?
.
Jeff: I think
Kris is somewhere else, man.
.
Will: We'll
see about that.
.
(There's
a pause for a moment, then Will turns towards Kris and
lets out
a very loud high-pitched squeal. Kris doesn't even flinch)
.
Lora: Cut
it out, Will!
.
(Will stops
the squealing noise)
.
Will: Hey
Anal! Can we make sure Kris isn't dead?
.
Jeff: Kris
is fine.
.
Will: Yeah,
you said that last night, too.
.
(Jeff leaves.
Pan around the Survivors again. Kris hasn't broken his gaze
on the idol.
Lora's becoming visibly shaky. Will appears to be tiring)
.
Will: I tell
you, Lora. A man can't win this game.
.
Lora: Kris
seems to be doing pretty well.
.
Will: As soon
as he loses his concentration, he's down like he was in the endurance challenge.
.
Lora: He outlasted
both of us there, Will.
.
(More time
passes. Will's becoming increasingly exhausted. Jeff returns)
.
Jeff: Guys, you've
reached three hours. How you feeling?
.
Lora: I don't
think either of us can outlast Kris.
.
Will: How
much can we legally mess with our opponents here?
.
Jeff: Just
don't touch them in any way.
.
Will: All
right.
.
(Will takes
his free arm and waves it up and down in Kris's line of vision
with the
idol. Kris breaks his gaze and looks quite perturbed)
.
Kris: D*** it!
Stop it, Will!
.
Will: Ooh!
You don't like that?
.
Kris: No!
.
(Will keeps
waving his free arm. Suddenly, his right foot slips)
.
Jeff: Will!
Your foot!
.
Will: I know.
.
Jeff: You're
done.
.
(Will hops
off his stump)
.
Jeff: Don't
walk near Kris or Lora.
.
Will: What
would you do if I knocked one of them off?
.
Jeff: Don't
go there.
.
(Will carefully
walks around Kris and Lora and has a seat in the sand)
.
Jeff: Neither
of you give up! Immunity's still up for grabs!
.
Will: (Narrating)
Well, I pulled an Ethan and fell off the log prematurely, so it's down
to Lora and Kris. Lora is determined, and I still think that she's
better equipped to stand than Kris is. No matter how zen he thinks
he is, he doesn't have the build to outlast her. .
Jeff: You're
now at three and half hours.
.
(Neither
Kris nor Lora respond. They just keep hanging on. Lora's arm
is
becoming
jelly-like, quivering with strain. Kris appears to still be completely
focused)
.
Jeff: Four
hours. Four hours.
.
Lora: (painfully)
Fall off, Kris!
.
Kris: (turning to
Lora) Are you willing to make a deal?
.
Lora: Yes.
Yes!
.
Will: Whoa.
Don't like where this is headed.
.
Kris: If I
hop off now, you'll take me to the Final Two, no?
.
Lora: I -
(looks at Will)
.
Kris: Well?
.
Lora: (looking down)
Yes. I'll do it.
.
Kris: I have
your word?
.
Lora: Yes.
.
Kris: It is
finished, then.
.
(Kris steps
back off his log)
.
Kris: (to Will) You
were right. I don't have the body type to compete with our dancer.
.
Jeff: All
right. (To Lora) Well-earned, you are safe, and it sounds like there's
a new deal in place. I will see you at Tribal Council shortly.
.
(Lora doesn't
smile as Jeff puts the Immunity Necklace
around her
neck. The three exit and head back to camp)
Smallwood
.
(The Final
Three return to camp. Lora leads the procession,
Immunity
Necklace gleaming in the late afternoon sun)
.
Lora: (Narrating)
So it turns out that I could have beat Kris in the challenge. He's
admitted that he was minutes away from collapsing when we made our deal.
Still, despite how my feelings for Will have changed, I did give
Kris my word. And I really don't think it would be right to go back
on that. .
(Kris stumbles
over to the shelter and collapses from exhaustion. Will watches in
astonishment)
.
Will: (Narrating)
Well, I'm screwed. Lora's made a deal with Kris, and I don't think
I have the ability to get her to change that. Not with the history
that we have. Still, I'd always regret it if I didn't give it one
last try. .
(Will approaches
Lora)
.
Will: So,
final two pact with Kris, huh?
.
Lora: I guess
so.
.
Will: Not
to be a pest, but I did save you at the last Tribal Council.
If I'd voted with Amanda, it would have been a tie, and Kris would have
got rid of you to avoid the rock.
.
Lora: I know.
.
Will: So,
any chance you might return that good deed?
.
Lora: Will,
I made a promise. I wasn't raised to go back on my word.
.
Will: I know.
But keep in mind it's just a game. You're guaranteed the win if you
take me to the final two.
.
Lora: I don't
know, Will. It's hard for me to seperate the game from real life
like that.
.
Will: You
did sign up so you could win the million dollars, right?
.
Lora: Yeah,
but... Look, I just don't know.
.
Will: All
right...
.
(Will leaves
Lora alone with her thoughts)
.
Lora: (Narrating)
I'm so confused right now. If I wanted to win this game, I could
just break my word and take Will. But it seems so wrong to betray
Kris like that right after I've learned to trust again. (sighs) This
game really sucks. .
(In the shelter,
Kris painfully turns over)
.
Kris: (Narrating)
Fact is, Lora would have a better chance against Will in the final vote
than she would against me. The jury is deadset against Will, but
they have less strong emotions about me. Surely Lora realizes this,
and I took a huge risk by bowing out of the challenge. I feel confident,
however, that Lora is the sort of girl who will remain true to her word.
I can only hope that my instincts are once again correct. .
(Kris limps
out of the shelter as the sun begins to set.
The Final
Three pack up and head for Tribal Council)
Tribal
Council #15
(Lora, Will,
and Kris enter Tribal Council)
.
Jeff: We'll now
bring in our jury.
.
(Brian, Melissa,
Dan, Kevin, Sylvia, and Amanda enter)
.
Jeff: They're
all here, including our newest member, Amanda.
.
(Flash to
Amanda, who looks slightly bitter)
.
Jeff: Well,
obviously, it's been a long day. Highs and lows for everybody.
We get to an immunity challenge where it really is about will power, ultimately.
You guys wanted it. You held on for a long time. And then,
what happened, Will?
.
Will: Instead
of focusing on myself, I tried to psyche Kris out. I was waving my
hand at him, and my leg just gave out on me. Completely unexpected,
but I knew that neither of us was beating Lora at Hands. The
challenge is biased towards women. Men simply aren't as good at standing.
.
Jeff: Well,
biased or not, you did fall off the stump, and Kris and Lora did
make a deal.
.
Will: (shrugs) So
it goes.
.
Jeff: Lora,
what was going through your mind after Will fell off?
.
Lora: I just
realized that once again, I was on my own. I couldn't count on anyone
else to carry me, so I had to stay on for myself.
.
Jeff: Kris,
any way you could have outlasted Lora?
.
Kris: There
was no way. I didn't allow it to show, but I was struggling every
minute to stay conscious. The blood was pooling in my legs.
I would have passed out far sooner than Lora would have given up.
.
Jeff: Lora,
Kris has just admitted that he couldn't have won the challenge. Do
you look at that and say, "Hey, maybe our agreement isn't valid, since
I only made it thinking I couldn't win."
.
Lora: I have
thought about that. But I don't know if it's right to think yourself
out of a promise like that.
.
Jeff: Well,
a big vote. Will, Kris, you can't vote for Lora. You can't
vote for yourselves. So therefore, you can only vote for each other.
You cancel each other out, so you won't vote. Lora will be the only
person casting a vote. There is a deal in place, but who knows if
it'll hold up. Will Lora stick to her promise, or will she go for
the money? Guess we're about to find out. It's time to vote.
Lora, you're up.
.
(Lora walks
to the voting booth and writes down her vote. We don't see it)
.
Lora: Oh,
this doesn't feel right, but I'm doing it.
.
(Lora puts
her vote in the canister and returns)
.
Jeff: I'll
go tally the vote.
.
(Jeff leaves
and returns with the voting canister)
.
Jeff: Once
this vote is read, the decision is final, the person will be asked to leave
the tribal council area immediately. I'll read the vote.
.
(Jeff pulls
out the vote)
.
The fourteenth person
voted out of the tribe:
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Will
.
Will: Yup.
Saw that one coming.
.
Jeff: Will,
I need you to bring me your torch.
.
Will: All
right, Anal.
.
(Will grabs
his torch and brings it to Jeff)
.
Jeff: Will,
the tribe has spoken. (snuffs his torch) It's time for you to go.
.
Will: I love
you, man!
.
(Will bear
hugs Jeff, who seems quite surprised)
.
Jeff: All
right. Take care now.
.
Will: (releasing
Jeff) You kids be good!
.
(Will exits)
.
Jeff: (regaining
his composure) Here's where we're at. You two have done what 14 others
failed to do. You've gone as far as you can go in this game on your
own power. This game now shifts from you to the seven members of
the jury. Seven people who you had a hand in voting out will now
have a hand in deciding which one of you two wins this thing. You
have one night left. One day tomorrow. Drink it in. There's
nothin' left to do! Take your torches, head back to camp. I will
most definitely see you tomorrow.
.
(Lora and
Kris exit)
Will's Final Words:
Did Mary Ellen and I have sex? I'm not sure how you're going
to edit this, but any way you do it, it's going to be about impossible
to hide the relationship. I think that's a question best left answered
by the camermen. We'll see how The Evil One decides to portray it.
.
Sylvia? Yeah, we
had some good times. Remember the jellyfish? Oh, we laughed for days
over that one. And the time that Dan put those sticks in his nose and pretended
to be a Walrus? Hoo boy, he had us in stitches. But seriously, I
gotta tell you, it's been a wonderful experience out here. I've been in
the middle of all this, well, all this nature, and it would be disingenuous
of me to not say that there was just too much drama and we spent too much
time out here in Mother Africa to not use uber-spoons, superpoles, and
pig-stickers and not come away as better people for it. I'll always remember
you people in my heart of hearts and it would do no justice to the Real
Slim Shady if I didn't put in a little plug here for Sierra Mist.
.
But you know what
really bugs me? The true question at this point, I think in all of our
minds, is this: why is it that when I visit my favorite gay porn sites,
I find Jeff Probst's pictures plastered all over the place? I mean, you
just can't escape the man.
.
On another, more
serious note, it was wrong of Lora to vote me off at this juncture. To
come so close and then have it ripped from your hands is disheartening,
to say the least. I like to think that I could have won this game very
easily if I'd done it the old fashioned-way, but I just didn't want things
to be that cookie cutter. I guess my real goal was just to make the jury,
and so here I am. The question becomes, which one of these clods deserves
my vote for the million? Dontchu worry, Willy boy be gonna make it fun
fer um. They haven't gotten rid of me yet, and I intend to have fun with
this all the way to the end. So, now I'm gonna go take a shower, have some
decent food, and... gee, what other cliches are there that I'm supposed
to do? I dunno. Mostly I just wanna see what stuff I can get away with
setting on fire around the base camp before they stop me. Phi Delt forever!
Soylent Green is People! People! I am Sparticus! Uh, okay. (exhales). Dang.
Voting Record:
Lora:
Will
Smallwood
.
(Lora and
Kris return to camp)
.
Kris: (Narrating)
I was 90% certain going into that Tribal Council that Lora would not turn
her back on our deal. There was that one moment of dread when I wasn't
sure which way she was going to go, but in the end, she was as honorable
as I'd expected. .
Lora: (Narrating)
If you'd asked me to vote off Will just two days ago, I wouldn't have skipped
a beat. But after I realized that he really was out to protect
me all along, it became the hardest thing in the world. I really
would have liked to give him second place, but I think he understood that
I had to honor my deal. .
(The Final
Two go to sleep, and the night quickly passes. The sun rises on Camp
Smallwood,
but no one
is doing anything. Cut to the inside of the shelter, where Lora and
Kris are sleeping in)
.
Kris: (Narrating)
Yesterday was exhausting for me, both physically and mentally, so it felt
quite good to just have a morning in which there was nothing to do. .
(Kris continues
to snooze. Lora stretches and walks out of the shelter)
.
Lora: (Narrating)
Our last day was really boring. Kris and I really don't have anything
in common, so there wasn't much for us to talk about. .
(Lora sits
and stares at the fire pit, which is now completely
dead.
Eventually, Kris comes out and joins her)
.
Kris: Day 39.
.
Lora: (smiles) Yeah.
.
(The two
don't speak for quite some time)
.
Kris: So,
how do you think the vote's going to go?
.
Lora: Too
close to tell.
.
Kris: I suppose.
(pauses) Do you think I have a chance?
.
Lora: Yeah.
I think we both do.
.
Kris: It might
come down to the questions for some of them. Are you prepared?
.
Lora: I think
so.
.
Kris: Me too.
.
Kris: (Narrating)
I cannot help obsessing over this evening's vote. I know that it's
possible for me to win, but I'm not sure on the exact mechanics of it.
I can think of three people who might go either way, and while I think
there are some people guaranteed to vote for Lora, I'm not sure there are
any who will certainly vote for me. The apprehension could very well
kill me before I can claim my prize. .
Lora: (Narrating)
Kris has played a dirty game at times, and I really want to believe that's
gonna come back to haunt him tonight. I'm almost positive that Dan
and Mrs. Brennit are going to vote for me tonight, and I hope that Will
and Sylvia will. But I'm not sure. I'm not sure at all.
I'm excited and scared and hopeful all at the same time, and I can't wait
for this to be over so I can just come down off this incredible high. .
(As the sun
begins to set, Kris and Lora pack up and start the hike to Tribal
Council.
As they walk, the jury members share their thoughts on the Final Two)
.
Will: (Narrating)
There was a time when it was a sure thing that I'd be a member of the final
two. If I'd let the game stay on the path it was chugging down, we'd
have dropped Kris and the other Platzes long ago and I would be sitting
next to Lora or Sylvia tonight on very good terms with the jury.
I really like to think that if I hadn't voted Mrs. Brennit out, I would
have won this game with no problems. But since I did make
that radical change, it was inevitable that I would end up on the jury.
Both of the final two have me to thank for their positions. I saved
them both on more than one occasion. As far as which one is more
deserving, it's Lora hands down. Kris's gameplan was in shambles
without my help, but Lora was able to rise up on her own many times.
And I really respect that. .
Melissa: (Narrating)
Oh, I'm really happy with the final two! I've been with Kris since
the beginning, and even though I didn't always agree with the way he was
playing the game, I still think he's a really neat person. And as
for Lora, well, she was always just so great to have around. She's
such a fun girl, and she's so full of life. It's going to be a lot
of fun to get a chance to talk to both of them again tonight. I can't
wait! .
Dan: (Narrating)
Yeah, I'm really looking forward to tonight. It's going to be cool
to hear what kind of questions everyone asks. I'm really proud of
Lora for making it to the final couple. I think that she really deserves
to be there. I just wish it wasn't that Kris guy that was there with
her. I never trusted that guy. He always seemed so shifty to
me, and I think it's pretty dumb that he made it even to second place.
He will not be receiving my vote tonight, that's for sure. .
Sylvia: (Narrating)
Making a decision tonight is going to be really tough. Not only were
Lora and Kris both fascinating specimens, they were also both very good
friends. I had so many good times with both of them that I don't
think I can make the decision on a purely emotional level. Instead,
I'll have to rely on my objectivity to decide which one had the more interesting
psychological journey. And even that's going to be a tough call. .
Brian: (Narrating)
F***! I can't believe I have to hang around for this s***.
If I'd had my way, I would have flown home by now and forgotten all about
this worthless a** game. Who gives a flying f*** who wins out of
that little goth s*** and that f***ing b**** Lora? Gawd! This
game is f***ing pathetic. .
Amanda: (Narrating)
Well, my plan may have failed, but it still looks like I'm going to be
a swing moving into the vote tonight. I've been allied with, and
been betrayed by both Kris and Lora, so I have reason to not vote
for either one of them. Which way I go will depend entirely on how
they choose to answer my question, so it'd be in their best interests to
fall all over themselves trying to impress me. ,
Kevin: (Narrating)
Hey, buddy. Tonight's the last night of the game. Yeah...
And, um, I'm supposed to vote for Kris or Lora. To, um, win the one
million dollars. That sure is a lot of money... If I had a
million dollars, I think I'd get a... Dodge Intrepid. That thing
is sweet! And, um, if I had any money left over, I'd get a
horse, probably. Oh, and you know what else would be good?
A trampoline. Not a little one, but one of those big ones.
The kind you can do flips on. I could never do a flip. I think
that was probably the hardest move of all. Yeah...
Tribal
Council #15
(Lora and
Kris enter Tribal Council)
.
Jeff: We'll now
bring in our jury.
.
(Brian, Melissa,
Dan, Kevin, Sylvia, Amanda, and Will enter.
Will is wearing
a sarong, at which Sylvia and Amanda are stifling laughs)
.
Jeff: As you
can see, tonight we have our full jury of seven, including Will, who was
voted out at the last tribal council. All right, before we get to
the final event, I want to find out how you guys spent your last day.
Your 39th day. Lora, how was the day for you?
.
Lora: It was
sort of boring. I mean, no offense to Kris, but he's not the most
exciting guy to hang around with.
.
Kris: No offense
taken.
.
Jeff: How'd
you guys occupy the time?
.
Kris: For
the most part, we discussed how we thought tonight would go. Both
of us are quite nervous.
.
Lora: (laughs) Yeah.
.
Jeff: OK,
you two have come as far as you can. The focus now shifts to the
seven members of the jury. It is one of the most unique aspects of
this game. Seven people that you had a hand in voting out now get
to decide your fate. You start this game with a clean slate, and
over 39 days, you build a history. Tonight, that history is gonna
be evaluated and ultimately judged. Your behavior, good or bad, as
well as how you respond to tonight's tribal council will have a big impact
on the final vote.
.
Here's how it'll
work: We'll begin with an opening statement by each of you.
A chance to address the jury and explain why you think you're the most
deserving person of the title, "Survivor" and the million dollars.
Then the jury gets the chance to address you. They can make a comment,
they can ask a question. You'll then get a chance to make a closing
statement addressing some of the things that have come up, then we go to
the vote. How you respond to these questions is very important.
.
It's time to begin.
Lora, opening statement to the jury.
.
Lora: OK.
Why do I deserve this honor of being named the sole Survivor? Because
I've earned it. As I look back on the person I was when I started
this game, I don't really like what was there. That Lora was scared.
She was insecure, whiney, and weak. So much so that she latched onto
what she thought was the strongest player in the game and hid behind his
power. I don't know what I ever saw in Brian. I really don't.
When the swap came, I was faced with a new reality: Play or die.
I had to start thinking for myself. I had to start branching out
and talking to people I wouldn't normally talk to. I had to be my
own person. Oh sure, I was still playing on emotion. I think
I always will, since I'm such an emotional person. But I was
playing. Time and time again, the people in power tried to keep me
down. And I struggled with it. I really did. But in the
end, my inner strength came through, and I was able to find my own power.
That's how I made it here. And that's why I'm a Survivor.
.
Jeff: (nods) Kris,
why do you deserve to win this?
.
Kris: Hmm...
Why do I deserve to win this? I think that if one were to peer into
the minds of each contestant as we went into this, one would find that
mine was most prepared for the rigors it would have to face. I know
that Amanda began to speak of her master plan sometime after the merge,
but I had my master plan in place well before I stepped foot on
Newfoundland or even knew who any of the other contestants were.
You see, I wanted to form a perfect alliance of the easily controlled and
ride that all the way to the endgame, where I would shed the unnecessary
players and be declared sole Survivor. My plan appeared to work at
first, when I gained a majority in the Platz clan, but hit a snag at the
swap. Although I'd anticipated it, the raw materials to reform my
alliance simply weren't there when I was shifted to Coble. I had
to completely rethink things. I was targetted as a threat on many
occasions, but the simple fact that I endured and made it here to this
final two spot is proof that I have played the best game. I implore
the jury, as you question us tonight, not to look at your own petty perceptions
of Lora and myself as people, but rather to look at us as players.
Thank you.
.
Jeff: OK,
jury. I want you guys to take some time to think about what Lora
and Kris just said, because in a moment, you're gonna ask each of them
a question that will help you decide who will be the sole Survivor.
Jeff: It's
now a chance for the jury to address Kris and Lora. You guys have
a very big vote to make tonight. This is a chance, one last chance,
to illicit a little more information before you vote for the person who
will win $1 million and the title of sole Survivor. You can ask a
question or make a statement. We'll begin with Will.
.
Will: OK,
yeah, you see the sarong and you think Will's going to be goofy happy.
But I'm going to be serious here. Kris, from the moment you set foot
on Coble beach, it was obvious to both of us that there was only room for
one of us in this game. It took you forever, but when you
made that deal with Lora yesterday, you finally got rid of me.
At times I enjoyed watching you play, at times I dissaproved of your tactics.
But through it all, we were rivals. And rivals we will remain.
.
Lora, let me just
say that it was never my intention to just drop you like the others.
Sylvia and I would have brought you in and dropped Kris and Kevin when
it came down to five. I'm not going to ask you anything. Despite
what happened yesterday, Lora's getting my vote.
.
Kris, you told us
to look at you as players. Well, I am. And as far as I'm concerned,
Lora did play the better game. The simple fact is, Kris wouldn't
be here if I hadn't have turned around and formed the short-lived alliance
with him. He's here by my mercy. And while I've saved Lora
at times, too, she received no help from me when she was trapped on Platz
with Brian and Maria. She lived through that on her own.
And because of that, I feel that Lora deserves to be called "Survivor."
.
Lora: Wow.
Thanks, Will.
.
Kris: Eloquently
said. I must respect your wishes.
.
(Will nods
and has a seat)
.
Jeff: (points) Smiley.
.
(Brian gets
up and faces the Final Two)
.
Brian: My
god! That was the most long-winded piece of bulls*** I've ever heard.
If everyone yakked that much, we'd be stuck here all night. I'm gonna
make this short. Lora, I would love to see the size of that silver
spoon wedged up your a**, you uptight b****. I was d*** good
to you, but you refused to put out. You're so f***ing stuck-up!
You think your s*** don't stink? Well guess what? You're not
getting my vote.
.
I mean, that Kris
kid's a wispy little nerd whose books I'd like to dump right now, but he's
getting my vote anyway, just because he's sitting next to s*** like you.
That's it.
.
(Lora looks
at Kris and shrugs. Brian sits down)
.
Jeff: Thank
you, Smiley. Sylvia?
.
(Sylvia stands
up and faces the Final Two)
.
Sylvia: Hi,
Lora. Hi, Kris.
.
Lora and Kris:
Hello, Sylvia.
.
Sylvia: Over
the course of 36 days, I got to know you both really well. And I
consider you both two of my best friends. It's going to be really
hard for me to decide between the two of you, so I want you to answer my
question very carefully. OK, here it is: What was the greatest
discovery you made about yourself, and when did you make it? Lora,
you can go first.
.
Lora: OK.
The greatest discovery I made about myself? I guess it was the way
that I learned to fend for myself. I've been pretty dependent on
other people my whole life, but when I was stuck over on that other side
all by myself, I had to learn how to take care of Lora. I had to
learn to draw on my inner strength, instead of just having other people
take care of things for me. Is that what you wanted?
.
Sylvia: That'll
do. Kris?
.
Kris: My greatest
moment of self-discovery... Well, actually, that would have come
from you, Sylvia. We were quite fortunate to have such an accomplished
psychoanalyst in our cast. You see, when I came into this game, I
looked at it as a game of chess. I was to be the gamemaster, and
the other players were to be my pawns. I didn't see the humanity
in my opponents. I merely saw obstacles that I had to bowl over.
But when I met you, you helped me to move past my callous attitude.
You treated me as a true friend, and for the first time, I was really able
to open up to someone. And so whether I win or lose this game, I'll
have been that much richer for having the experience of meeting you.
.
Sylvia: Wow.
Do you really mean that?
.
Kris: Of course.
.
Sylvia: All
right. Thanks, guys.
.
(Sylvia has
a seat)
.
Jeff: Thank
you, Sylvia. Kevin, you're up, buddy. Time to ask your question.
.
(Kevin stands
up, but instead of facing the Final Two, he turns around and faces the
jury)
.
Kevin: Hey...
Brian. Remember that time we saw the, um, whales?
.
Jeff: Kevin,
over here! You're addressing Lora and Kris, not Brian.
.
Kevin: Oh.
.
(Kevin turns
around and faces Lora and Kris)
.
Kevin: Hey
guys, remember the time me and Brian saw the whales?
.
Lora: (laughs) Yeah
Kev. You had a really good time that day, huh?
.
Kevin: Yeah....
.
Kris: That
was right before we started voting together, wasn't it, Kevin?
.
Kevin: I think...
maybe. Yeah, probably...
.
(Kevin stares
off into the distance for a moment, then turns, walks back, and sits down)
.
Jeff: Um,
thanks, Kevin... Amanda, you're up.
.
Amanda: Kris,
Lora. I'll let you know up front that I'm not very happy with either
of you for voting me off. But, since I do have to ask a question,
here goes: Give me two reasons why I should not vote for the
person sitting next to you. Lora, you go first.
.
Lora: Wow.
Why shouldn't you vote for Kris?
.
Amanda: Right.
.
Lora: Um,
OK. Well, Kris never really got to know anyone. He was always
so distant and hard to read. And, um... well, he was in an alliance
to vote you off. I guess that's two reasons.
.
Amanda: All
right. Kris?
.
Kris: Lora
shouldn't win because, one, she's played too emotionally and held grudges
over non-events, and two, the only reason she's in the final two is sheer
luck. She survived by the fact that there was always a bigger target,
not by any strategizing of her own.
.
(Lora looks
at Kris, slightly hurt. He shrugs this off)
.
Amanda: Thanks.
.
(Amanda has
a seat)
.
Jeff: Thank
you, Amanda. Melissa?
.
(Melissa
stands up and faces the Final Two)
.
Melissa: First
off, I just want to say great job, guys! I am so proud of both of
you! Will and Sylvia have already explained to me why I went, so
that answered my big question. (turns to Will and smiles) Shaking
up the game! You're crazy, Will! (turns back to the Final Two)
So I guess I'll ask you, how you're going to spend the money. You
first, Lora.
.
Lora: How
will I spend the money? Well, I guess I'd use part of it to pay off
some of my student loans. And the rest of it, I'd just save for a
house, a car, all the things I'll need when I get out of school.
.
Melissa: Cool!
How would you spend it, Kris?
.
Kris: Hmm...
You've caught me a bit off guard, Mrs. Brennit. I suppose that, like
Lora, I would eventually spend it on a home, vehicle, and other necessities.
I certainly don't plan to blow it. I'd rather invest it wisely and
see it grow, I believe.
.
Melissa: All
right! Thanks, guys!
.
Jeff: Thank
you, Melissa. Dan the man, you're up!
.
Dan: Hmm...
Well, I didn't really have a question prepared when I got here. I
hoped I'd think of one while eveyone else was asking theirs.
So, I think I've thought up a pretty good one as I've been sitting here.
Here goes: Why shouldn't I give my vote to the person sitting
next to you?
.
(The jury
lets out a collective groan)
.
Jeff: Um,
Dan? Amanda already asked that.
.
Dan: She did?
.
Amanda: (annoyed)
Yes!
.
Dan: OK.
I guess I don't really have a question, then. Good job making it
to the Final Two, though.
.
(Dan shuffles
back to his seat)
.
Jeff: Well, that
was certainly a mixed bag of questions. You'll have a chance to address
any concerns that have come up in your final comments to the jury.
Take a moment, think about what you want to say.
Jeff: OK.
You've heard the jury's comments. Had a chance to think about what
they had to say. Now this is your chance to respond. It is
time for your final comments. Kris?
.
Kris: All
right. Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, I implore you. Look
past your personal feelings tonight, as this is a game. Yes,
Lora is more likeable than I am. That's simple fact. But there's
another simple fact to consider. I have been a target this entire
game. Whether I wanted it or not, the spotlight has been on me and
what moves I have made. I have been a true player from day one, and
though I may have wanted to slip into the backround at times, no one ever
forgot that Kris Tebalt was playing this game. Do not reward mediocrity.
Instead, hand the game to the one person who's consistently been its top
player. Thank you.
.
Jeff: Lora,
your final address to the jury.
.
Lora: I'd
just like to say that I am not mediocre. I have been a force
in this game ever since I came into my own, and I have been a force to
be reckoned with. I may not have had a plan to start out with, but
I sure had to make one up as I went along. Luck may have had some
part in getting me here, but Kris got lucky, too. He's played an
OK game, but I really don't think he's played as well as me. I've
been through so much. I really think I have earned the right
to be the Survivor.
.
Jeff: OK.
So it comes to the vote. Tonight's vote is a little different.
Tonight you are not voting someone out of the tribe. The name of
the person you write down on the parchment is the person you think most
deserving of title of "Survivor" and the million dollars. You are
voting for a winner. It's time to vote. Brian, you're first.
.
(Brian walks
up to the voting booth and writes down a name. It's Chris)
.
Brian: Like I
said out there, you're a pathetic little geek who doesn't deserve a dime,
but since you're up against that stuck-up b**** Lora, you win by default.
Congratulations. Maybe you and all your little goth friends can spend
it on black make-up or something. Lousy little faggot...
.
(Brian returns
and Dan goes to vote. He votes for Lora)
.
Dan: I never trusted
that Kris guy, and Lora was always pretty cool, so she gets my vote.
Also, let me just say this: Kevin, seek... help! They didn't
go with you to see the whales, buddy. Get over it.
.
(Dan returns
and Kevin goes to vote. We don't see it)
.
Kevin: Here's
my vote. I hope I did it right.
.
(Kevin returns
and Will goes to vote. He votes for Lora)
.
Will: My vote,
of course, goes to Lora. (scoffs) Like I was going to give it to Kris!
He was my blood enemy! Lora, I was really impressed by your game.
Not so much by your answers tonight, but I hope that won't make a difference.
Good luck.
.
(Will returns
and Melissa goes to vote. She votes for Lora)
.
Melissa: Lora,
I'm giving my vote to you. You were a constant ray of sunshine for
me in what turned out to be a pretty intense game. I always felt
so bad for you when you were down on your luck, but I knew you had what
it took to turn things around. So, congratulations on making it to
the end and hopefully for winning. And Kris, no offense. I
really like you, too, but I had to vote for Lora.
.
(Melissa
returns and Sylvia goes to vote. She votes for Kris)
.
Sylvia: Kris,
I wish that I could have sided with you and Will, but in the end
I had to make a choice. I guess this is my way of making that up
to you. I'm sorry, Lora. I just liked Kris's answers more.
You know I'll always love you, and I hope we stay really good friends outside
of the game. OK.
.
(Sylvia returns
and Amanda goes to vote. We don't see it)
.
Amanda: It's been
an intense game, and in the end, I guess you're the more deserving winner.
Congratulations.
.
Jeff: I'll
go tally the votes.
.
(Jeff leaves
and returns with the voting canister)
.
Jeff: OK,
I know it's been a long 39 days, I know you'd like to see this settled
tonight. Unfortunately, it's gonna have to wait until we get
back to the United States. Good night.
.
(Wind starts
to swirl around the Survivors as a helicopter descends on the Tribal Council
set.
Jeff tucks
the voting canister under his arm and sprints off towards the helicopter.
He climbs
in the side
and it begins to ascend. The Survivors watch in surprise. Kevin
is particularly awed)
.
Kevin: Woah!
.
(Fade to
black on the Newfoundland Tribal Council)
(Fade back in to the helicopter flying over
the forests and plains of Missouri. Jeff stares
out the window
as the landscape flies by beneath him. The helicopter approches
a small,
rectangular town, its lights clearly visible against the surrounding dark
plain.
.
Jeff's helicopter
enters the airspace above Sherman Oaks, Missouri. A huge crowd has
gathered
in the library's park at the town's center. The helicopter descends
at the side.
People grab
their hats to prevent them from being blown away. The helicopter
touches down,
and Jeff steps out the side. The crowd erupts into cheers and applause.
.
Jeff waves
to them and walks up onto stage. Lora and Kris, no longer dressed
in their
grubby clothes,
sit on two benches in the center of the stage. The jury sits on a
bench off to the left.
The crowd
continues to applaud as Jeff approaches his podium. He motions for
them to quiet down.
.
Jeff: Well,
we have traveled from Canada's crappiest territory to what is without a
doubt the greatest state in America. How's it going, Missouri?
.
(The crowd
erupts into cheers)
.
Jeff: I can't
think of a better place for this final vote to play out than right here
in Library Park in Sherman Oaks. I have the votes. We're gonna
get to them. But first, it's been five months since we finished this.
Five months since these votes were cast. Nothing you two do or say
tonight is gonna change these votes. Outcome already determined, just not
yet revealed.
.
So with that in
mind, anything you two want to say? Kris?
.
Kris: (calm and
collected) I just want to say that I'm not as bad of a guy as I appear
on TV. I'm not a robot. I do have emotions.
.
Jeff: How
'bout you, Lora?
.
Lora: (nervous and
jittery) Just the opposite for me, I guess. I'm not this manic-depressive
emotional wreck that everyone thinks I am. (laughs nervously)
.
Jeff: Well,
there's no arguing, you two played better than the other 14. No matter
what they may try to tell you later or argue otherwise, you're sitting
here, they aren't. What we're gonna find out now, of the two of you,
who played the best. I want to poll the jury. Has anybody talked
about their vote with anybody else?
.
(The jury
murmurs "no")
.
Jeff: Cool.
Votes tonight, are a little different. You're not voting somebody
out. Tonight, you're voting for somebody. You're voting for
a winer. You want to see your name on this parchment tonight. There
are seven votes. It takes four to win. At stake, for the winner,
brand new Dodge Caravan, color of your choice, title of Sole Survivor,
and a million bucks.
.
I'll read the votes.
.
First vote:
.
Lora
.
Lora
.
Two votes Lora.
.
Chris
.
Two votes Lora,
one vote Kris.
.
Kris
.
Two votes each.
It takes four to win.
.
Kris
.
Three votes Kris.
Two Lora.
. .
Lora
.
Can't get any tighter.
Three votes Lora, three votes Kris, one vote left. The winner of
Survivor Newfoundland: .
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
. .
Kris
.
(Kris is
stunned)
.
Kris: (turning to
the jury) Me? You chose me?
.
Jeff: That's
right!
.
Kris: I won...
(turns to Lora) I did it!
.
Lora: (saddened)
Yeah. Great...
.
(As it starts
to sink in, Kris starts to shout and dance)
.
Kris: My plans
succeeded! I am the Survivor!
.
(The jury
gathers round to congratulate the now ecstatic Kris. Sylvia's the
first to hug him)
.
Kris: Sylvia!
You voted for me!
.
Sylvia: (laughing)
Yeah. Even after you "used" me.
.
(Off to the
side, Lora looks depressed)
.
Lora: Sucks
to be me.
.
(Will hears
her and turns to comfort her)
.
Will: At least
you got a hundred thousand.
.
Lora: (smiles) Yeah,
I guess.
.
(Kris continues
to celebrate with the jury)
.
Kris: Thank
you for your vote, Brian!
.
Brian: Yeah?
P*** off, nerd boy.
.
Kris: I love
this man!
.
(As Ancient
Voices begins to play, Jeff snuffs Lora's torch. Kris's family,
including his cousin Matt,
races down
the the stage. On the side, all 16 castaways, starting with Becky,
start to pile in. Suddenly,
the crowd
gasps as a spotlight shines on a pair of parachuters, dropping in on the
festivites.
.
The parachuters
land in the center of the stage. The first one is fat. She
takes off her helmet
to reveal
that she's Rosie O'Donnell. She takes off the helmet of the other
parachuter)
.
Rosie: Look!
It's Survivor Missouri's Scott! How you doin', buddy?
.
Scott: I am
doing great.
.
Rosie: Well
good for you, you look terriffic! Now get off my stage, you crazy
kid!
.
(Rosie pushes
Scott off-stage. He dives into the crowd with
a goofy "Whoa-oh!"
Rosie approaches Jeff)
.
Jeff: What
up, Rosie?
.
Rosie: Number
two, we'll see you at number three!
.
(Jeff shakes
Rosie's hand and begins to leave)
.
Rosie: Jeff
Probst! Give it up for Jeff Probst!
.
(Rosie turns
to the Survivors)
.
Rosie: The
Survivors! Here's the survivors! How are you?
.
Kris: Wonderful,
Rosie!
.
Rosie: I know
what Lora was thinking when when it wasn't her name: Where's Maria?
Cat fight! Do we have that clip ready?
.
(A clip of
Lora and Maria rolling around on the ground plays in slow-mo)
.
Rosie: (flushed)
Wow, that's hot!
.
(The Survivors
stare at Rosie in disbelief)
.
Rosie: Oh,
sorry. (regaining her composure) You know what? You guys have all
been amazing. This has been the greatest hour on TV, because I think
this is the greatest show on TV. And I tell you what, I think you're
all winners just for playing. So... I've arranged for each
of you to receive your own check for one... million... dollars!!!
.
(The losers
look at each other in shock, then start celebrating)
.
Kris: (outraged)
What?
.
Rosie: Well,
except for you, of course, Kris. You've already got the million G's,
you know what I'm saying?
.
Kris: This
is an outrage!
.
Rosie: Well,
so was your winning, but you don't hear me complaining. Now, what
we need to kick off this reunion in a special way is a production number.
So... hit it, Ricardo!
.
(The band
begins to play the theme from "Gilligan's Island"
Rosie starts
to bob and sway in time with the music)
.
Offstage Voice:
She's out of control! Snipers!
.
(Suddenly,
gunfire erupts all around. The Survivors duck for cover as Rosie
goes down in a hail of
bullets.
The music stops and the screen cuts to black. It comes back to Jeff
standing in front of the camera)
.
Jeff: So, that's
it for Newfoundland. But be sure to be back here after Christmas
for Survivor: Nicaragua!
.
(Pan out
as the Survivors examine Rosie's cold body. Credits start to roll)